


To Do List | Jennie

by fiestar



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), GOT7, K-pop
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fuckgirl, Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Teenage Drama
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-09-07 12:41:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16854151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fiestar/pseuds/fiestar
Summary: Follow me onTumblrfor more.





	1. To Do List

The bathroom is seen as a hallowed place of privacy and solitude. An area where you’re free to sing into your hairbrush thinking you sound like an undiscovered Beyoncé when really you sound like an off-key, drunk aunt. A place where you can accept made up awards for the best makeup and take a litany of selfies to preserve the perfection that will likely disappear once you step out of that perfect bathroom lighting. Even most public bathroom offer a shred of the same atmosphere of privacy you can only truly capture at home. But bathrooms in high school are the complete inversion of these principles of solitude. Just pushing the door open from the hallway to gauge whether or not you want to brave the battlefield that is a high school girls’ bathroom is a risky decision. You could look in and see what you’d expect, which is to say girls brushing their hair and touching up their makeup, or something odd but not entirely unheard of like a group of girls lip syncing to a song coming from someone’s SnapChat. Either way you usually decide that your bladder can last a few more hours until you can drive home and use your own bathroom. You’ve been doing it for years so why stop now? 

The reason why ends up being your own dangerously empathetic heart. It’s the lagging space between you’re English and History class that’s blocked out by a senior free period as you’ve accumulated almost all of your credits needed to graduate accept for the core four that you still trudge to school for everyday. It’s quite a jarring change of pace compared to your completely full schedule as a freshman. Now you spend three hours wandering the halls and going to lunch between reading the assigned acts of some Shakespeare play and learning about the military history of the world. One you find rather intriguing as you’ve always had a certain affinity for enjoying and analyzing literature from both past and present. The other, however, is a tragic bore that you’re forced to sit through if you want to walk across that stage at the end of the year. That promise of that commencement ceremony has gotten you through the grueling hours of school where everything seems to grind to a halt as your first period classmates struggle to grasp the clever metaphors of Hamlet and you’re confined to the library during your free period because of some arbitrary visit from a superintendent or otherwise important figurehead of the education system. Luckily, today isn’t one of those days. 

English passed easily due to the third act assessment that you spent a less than appropriate amount of time studying for. It left that last hour of class open for you to do anything you wanted within the rules of the code of conduct. You’d spent most of your time on a school laptop playing on a website you were almost convinced was shut down after its rise to popularity when you were in middle school. Amazingly it hasn’t been blacklisted by the school yet and you remembered your cringe-worthy username and painfully hackable password. You even managed to rope your friend Ji Soo into it once she heaved a heavy sigh of acceptance and turned in her test half completed. It wasn’t uncommon for the math savvy girl and your teacher barely batted an eye at the lackluster state of her bubble sheet. 

You wonder about Ji Soo now as you aimlessly pace through the halls sans a pass that allows you to be anywhere but the designated area for free period students, i.e. the library and senior lounge. One is more favorable than the other but your sanctuary of books is currently being used by a rowdy class of freshman that should be working on some type of project judging from the shrill pleas of their teacher. You consider heading to the senior lounge, but your feet turn you down the hall of the upperclassmen wing that leads to Ji Soo advanced placement math class. It’s AP Statistics if you aren’t mistaken and the class is an abhorrent jumble of long paragraphs and complex numbers. Ji Soo manages to gobble it all down like ramen and spit out the most elaborate explanations for her inevitably correct answer. It’s truly something to marvel at, but you doubt her teacher will enjoy you popping into his class to disturb one of his best students. You consider your options. Maybe they have a substitute today. 

Opting to text her rather than barge in on a class in session you awkwardly shift your book bag to one shoulder to dig in the front pouch for your phone. It nearly goes careening across the floor as someone steamrolls past you in a fit of suppressed whimpers. Any other time you’d be a bit miffed about someone running into you and continuing on without an acknowledgement, but they seem otherwise occupied. You catch the tail end of a sleek ponytail swinging behind the person in question as they barrel through the bathroom door. Curiosity gnaws at your gut and you make the decision to shove your phone back in your bookbag–stupid uniform skirt–and follow the crying girl into her safe haven. She didn’t even have the wherewithal to duck into one of the stalls to at least retain her anonymity. Instead, Lisa is curled up on the dingy tiled floor under the window with the broken screen, head in her knees as she cries to herself. It feels like you’re intruding on a rather personal moment until you remember that she made the decision to flop onto the floor instead of diving into one of the vacated stalls. 

Thoroughly conflicted, you deliberate by the sinks for a moment. Though Lisa is in your grade and has been since she moved here back in middle school, you’ve never been close to her. There’ve been a few interactions outside of school here and there but nothing too major. A cordial congregation of people at the pizza parlor down the street from school where most people do to wait for rides and work on projects after school. A beneficial sharing of a scratchy afghan during a sleepover during a particularly cold winter. And a few of those dreaded meeting at the supermarket where your parents absolutely have to stop in the middle of the isle for half an hour to swap recipes and discuss PTA meeting topics while the two of you linger a healthy distance away, pretending that you both don’t want to just go home already. There’s not much to go on in terms of being comforting with the intimacy levels of a loaf of bread between the two of you, so you pretend to reapply your lipgloss for a few seconds too long before cutting your losses and dropping down next to her. The cold tiles easily seeps through your skirt as you angle your legs so your bare skin isn’t touching the questionably sanitary floor. Lisa peeks up through her bangs at the sudden movement and a look of mutual understanding passes between the two of you. 

You’re a good person who doesn’t like to see other people upset–a trait hard to come by in the age of bullying and perfection–and Lisa looks to be in desperate need of some type of companionship. There’s a bit of hesitance as she leans towards you, but it melts away as another wave of tears streaks down her cheeks and she collapses against your shoulder. It’s endearingly awkward as you move to rub her back in what you hope is a soothing and not creepy way. It seems to do the trick because the quiet sobs have dulled down to an occasional sniffle. Eventual she lifts her head and shuffles over to the paper towel dispenser. You wish you had proper tissues to offer her because she’s looking like a bit of a mess with makeup running down her cheeks and those cheap, B grade napkins aren’t going to do much, but you stopped carrying around packs of tissues when the weather started to heat up. Now you feel bad as you watch Lisa drag out a long ribbon of crumbly grey paper. She doses it in a fair amount of water before plopping back down next to you. 

“I suppose you probably want to know why I was crying?” She phrases it like a question, but leers at you over the jagged edge of the bundle of soggy paper towels like she already knows your answer. Truthfully, you are curious as to why she stormed out of class to go cry in the bathroom but you’re too polite to say it outright. 

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” 

“I don’t,” she deadpans, “but I trust you. You’re not like the rest of these assholes. You and your friends are all right. Mine; not so much.” She carefully tugs at the layer of synthetic lashes that were carefully glued on top of her own. Her tears have loosened their hold and now the right set hangs lopsided on her eyelid. She opts to take both of them off and passes them to you like you’ve been best friends for years. You hold them carefully in your palm, reminded of how you used to pick up caterpillars when you were little. 

“Bam Bam–wait, you know Bam Bam, right?” Yeah, do know him. He’s a rather cute boy that has a tendency to emulate popular trends long after they’ve passed their expiration date just because he still likes them. You find it admirable every time you see him proudly dabbing without a shred of irony in the halls or trying to do a perfect bottle flip in the cafeteria. The longest interaction you’ve had with him ended a few months ago when you were reassigned to a new lab partner after having been his for the past semester. He’s an agreeable boy and you tell Lisa as much. 

“Yeah, yeah, great kid. He’s my bro. It’s _his_ ‘bros’ that are the problem. Not even all of them. Just one!” Lisa hisses, putting more vigor into scrubbing the tracks of advertised-as-waterproof mascara off her cheeks. You raise a questioning eyebrow as you watch her remove her entire face of makeup with short, angry strokes. 

“Stupid Jin Young–” 

“The class president?” The only other Jin Young you can think of is a standoffish kid from your gym class. You can’t imagine Bam Bam being friends with such a timid person. 

“Yeah, him. He apparently feels the need to micromanage everything Bam Bam does.” She angrily shoots the wad of wet paper towels into the trash can. Neither of you move when it snags precariously on the edge. 

“I’ve liked Bam Bam for a while now, years if I’m being honest–can you hold this?–and Jin Young has made it his duty to play gatekeeper with Bam Bam’s relationship status.” 

“He won’t let you two date? That’s dumb.” You shift so you’re sitting with your legs crossed at the ankles so you can lay the abandoned lashes in your lap and hold open the makeup bag Lisa dug out of her purse. 

“Right?” She huffs. “I haven’t done anything to him and he’s just being so–” She cuts herself off to groan angrily while dabbing foundation under her eyes to cover the dark circles that have become a universal identifier of any type of student past the level of elementary school. “Do you know what Bam Bam did to me just now? Probably because of stupid Jin Young.” 

“You know I don’t,” you jest. It feels natural to be joking with a girl you’ve only had sporadic contact with even though she’s been a constant in your life for at least six years. Lisa nudges you with her shoulder, a playful smile on her lips. 

“Well,” she begins dramatically, “me and Bam Bam–“ 

“Bam Bam and I.” 

“Shush, you. ‘ _Bam Bam and I_ ’ have been talking for a few months now, just texting and keeping up a streak on SnapChat. Nothing major, right? It was casual. I didn’t want to look too desperate and he never tried to push it past that, so I left it to see how everything would play out. But last week he started getting more flirty with his texts, so obviously I played along or whatever. Everything was going fine and last night he asked me on a date to see that new movie that comes out this weekend and I said ‘yes’. He didn’t answer after that so I thought he fell asleep, but then he didn’t answer my good morning text or open my Snap and just now he said that we probably shouldn’t go on a date together and just drop contact all together.” 

You’re about to tell her that the entire situation sounds rather suspicious after hearing that Jin Young is poking his nose into their business, but your voice is overlapped by the heavy creak of the bathroom door being pushed open. The bell hasn’t rung yet so it’s not the passing period rush yet, but you wish it was because a bunch of girls minding their own business between classes would be better than the mess of heavy panting and sighs of pleasure that start up after the door to the handicap stall locks. You hadn’t looked up in time to see who’s about to have a second period tryst in the first floor bathroom, but whoever it is doesn’t sound the slightest bit ashamed or worried about being caught. Perhaps they hadn’t seen the two of you on the floor, just like you hadn’t seen the two of them walk in. Lisa rolls her eyes dramatically before closing one to re-apply her eyeliner. 

“I call bullshit on this whole thing.” You tell her. “If Jin Young has been up your asses for this long I’m pretty sure he’d be the first person to try to ruin your date. Have you texted Bam Bam since he took back his offer?” You’re mindful to keep your voice down just incase the two girls groping each other in the biggest stall decided to dedicate some of their attention to your conversation. You don’t want to be the one to expose Lisa if everything has been low key up to now. 

“How could I? I barely held it together long enough to ask to go to the library. I’m sure Mrs. Choi won’t be happy if she finds out I’m actually doing my makeup on the bathroom floor instead of studying in the library. It’s probably loud in there anyway.” 

“It is. I was coming from there when you ran into me.” 

“Sorry about that, by the way. I was in my feelings. I swear I’m usually more polite.” She laughs. “Hold.” You take the compact mirror from her hand as she retrieves one of the lashes from your lap. It’s intriguing to watch her use her nails like tweezers as she easily sets the falsies in place. 

“I say you text him and see what happens. Nothing serious, though. Ask him for homework or something.” Lisa uses one hand to fan at her eyes to get the glue to dry faster and uses the other to pass her phone to you. 

“The password is 8-8-1-6.” She sounds aloof as she carefully paints a line of black over the dried glue, all of her focus on keeping her hand steady. You feel somewhat honored to have her bestowing enough trust in you to want your help with trying to patch things up with her long-time crush. You don’t really get to hear about all the boy drama with Ji Soo. She’s been going steady with the same guy since sixth grade. Jin is a respectable guy and he tells the best jokes, so he’s always had your approval. There’s never been a reason for you to hear anything bad out of their relationship except when he asked if they should break up because he was going to college out of state. It was an easily resolved issue that they haven’t regretted in the two years he’s been gone. They look like a May-December couple, but you know they’re perfect for each other. It’s nice to be able to hear only good things from high school romances but you’re feeling oddly giddy just hearing the cliff notes of this Bam Bam and Lisa drama. It’s a nice change of pace. 

“What classes do you have with him?” You ask, fingers hovering over the keyboard. As she said, there are the texts in blue and grey. The date proposal, her quietly excited acceptance, the unanswered good morning, and the harsh rejection. He hasn’t even bothered to explain himself. You also note that there’s a lack of emojis in the clipped text even though they’re abundant throughout all of his grey text bubbles. 

“We have Engineering together on B days.” You don’t mention how lucky she is that all this went down on an A day or else they're be unbearable tension between them through the entire class period. You took Engineering last year and manage a casual enough inquiry about when the online model is due for the current project. 

“We’re on the bridge unit,” Lisa supplies while shuffling all her cosmetics back into their pouch. 

“I remember that,” you nod. “Our bridge would’ve held the most weight if we weren’t lazy and had gotten a full piece of balsa wood for the top support instead of using two small pieces.” It had been Ji Soo that was too wrapped up in studying for her upcoming unit test in AB Calculus to bother going to get you the extra length of balsa wood and your hands were busy holding two drying sections together. You both still pulled through with low A’s since yours at least didn’t break completely in half under the weights. 

“He’s answering!” Lisa squeaks, clambering so close that she’s almost in your lap as you both hunch over the screen. You wait with bated breath for the bouncing ellipsis to turn into words. The bubble disappears then reappears a few times before settling for the lackluster response of _I don’t know. Ask someone else_. You know Bam Bam well enough to know he wouldn’t be so curt with someone. Or use such perfect vernacular while texting. 

“Sounds fake.” You say with pursed lips. Lisa looks to be on the verge of tears again as she stares blankly at the screen. 

“Hey, come on,” you hug her shoulder reassuringly, “we’ll figure this out. Who else is Bam Bam friends with?” 

“Yu Gyeom, Young Jae. Them. I don’t think he talks to anyone else.” She concludes. The ‘them’, you know, is the group of swoon worthy boys that are always the topic of debate during lunches which is why you tend to stay away from the heart-eyed underclassmen that faint at the very thought of a senior boy glancing their way. When you were their age you were more worried about when you had to return your library books and when the next season of your favorite drama would air. Though they’re all in your grade you hadn’t obsessed over them like some of the more superficial girls who just wanted to use them as a ticket to the top of the popularity charts. They’re just regular guys to you, some you’d even consider your friend. But you can understand everyone’s obsession on some level. 

Jae Bum is the epitome of mysterious bad boy and you’re not ashamed to admit that his enigmatic ways intrigue you. Mark is the suave charmer that could melt anyone with just a glance. You’ve seen him charm his grade up six percentage points in a span of twelve minutes. You’d timed the whole interaction between your brick wall of a teacher and extremely persuasive classmate–for science, of course. Jackson is the double-sided coin that can turn from cute to deadly in a matter of seconds. Jin Young is king of the school and plays the stoic, too-good-for-you role seamlessly. Young Jae is the bookish type that tutors people for a fair price of a bag of chips per session. Then there’s the outgoing yet soft spoken Bam Bam. With Yu Gyeom being the youngest of the seven and most sought after for his undeniable aesthetic appeal but you know he isn’t as one dimensional as they make him out to be. The two of you had the same piano teacher back in elementary and middle school. 

Out of the seven you’re closest to Bam Bam, Jackson, and Yu Gyeom, but you can’t really text Bam Bam in this situation so you opt for the oldest of the trio. Jackson answers in seconds after you inquire about Bam Bam’s whereabouts in what you hope is a casual way. 

_Ive seen him around today but he doesn’t have his phone_ You raise your brows to your hairline at this new piece of information. 

_What did he break it?_ You add a laughing emoji at Lisa’s requests. 

_No I think he left it at Jin Young’s house when we were hanging out yesterday._  
_You know Lisa right? He finally grew a pair and asked her out. He’s prolly pissed he didn’t see her answer_ Lisa shoots up from the floor with an accusatory look on her face while you thank Jackson and tell him you’ll see him at lunch. 

“That fucking _prick_!” Her voice echoes through the small room. The reverberations of her voice are answered by a hearty chuckle as the door to the handicap stall is thrown open and a girl stumbles out unceremoniously. 

“You should invest in some long lasting makeup,” You recognize the voice that quips at the disheveled girl as she tried to straighten her uniform and smooth her ruffled hair. You vaguely recognize the girl from your math class and she looks utterly embarrassed to be caught in such a compromising situation with her makeup notably messy. Though Lisa is too busy seething to care about her and you’re not particularly surprised now that you know who she was in the stall with. A hand reaches out from behind the stall door to wipe away a smudge of pink lipstick from the girl’s face and is followed by the rest of Jennie Kim as she smirks at the girl before nodding towards the door. She disappears accordingly. 

“As for you, dear Lisa,” Jennie coos. The way she leans so carelessly against the edge of the sink, dabbing away nonexistent lipstick marks rubs you the wrong way. “Join our team. It’s more fun when you don’t have to worry about pricks, or the men attached to them.” Lisa just glared at the token fuckgirl of the senior class, completely unamused by her propositioning. 

“No?” She shrugs and her hair falls behind her raised shoulders, revealing the trail of purple marks littered across her skin. “How about your friend.” You bristle at the way Jennie looks at you through hooded eyes in a way you’re sure would make any other girl melt into a compliant puddle at her feet. You don’t feel the effects nearly as intensely as some and simply toss your hair over your shoulder in a show of defiance. 

“Oh, is that a challenge, baby girl?” The purr of her voice has you shifting slightly but you mask it by turning to check your phone. 

“It’s almost the end of second period,” you inform Lisa. She nods, still pacing in the small space like a caged lion waiting for the chance to rip out the throat of her prey. It would be nothing short of entertaining to watch Lisa take Jin Young down a few pegs but she has a class to get to. 

“Text me.” She tosses noncommittally over her shoulder as she brushes past Jennie to the exit. You’re confident you actually do have her number saved in your phone just as you’re confident that you haven’t used it since sophomore year when you guys got put in a group together for a World History Project. You scorn the fact that you’re back to being by yourself until third lunch an hour from now. 

“Can I have your number, too?” Jennie is suddenly much closer than she was a minute ago and you brace yourself against the windowsill in an attempt to put some distance between you. You shake your head, afraid to speak and embarrass yourself with how squeaky your voice probably sounds compared to the low drawl of her seductive words. 

“I really can’t figure your type out,” she continues on through the blatant rejection, “you bookish girls that always follow the rules and want to do good in the world. So uptight and so _sexually ambiguous_.” For a moment you’re reminded that Jennie is in the same high level English as you. Her head rocks back and forth like she’s weighing something in her mind. “Is she straight? Does she like girls? God, I hope you like girls.” She whispers as her arms settle outside your body, caging you between her and the broken screen. “But I wouldn’t say no to watching you with a boy.” Her eyes aren’t even trying to stay focused on your face anymore as they slide down to your chest. The top two buttons of your blouse are undone because of the heat of summer’s fast approach and your hatred for the stupid bow tie with the frills that scratche your neck when you actually decide to wear it. Technically, it’s a part of your uniform, but as a senior and otherwise good kid teachers are much more lenient with you. Jennie, however, has so many buttons undone that you can see her bra, like the shade of fire truck red wasn’t already visible enough through the thin white shirt. You look away before she can catch you staring and get any ideas. 

You honestly haven’t found a reason to cement yourself on one side of the spectrum or the other. While Jennie proudly boasts her lesbian title and her girlfriend Chae Young–who’s had a vendetta against you since her crush picked you to be his dance partner during that awkward unit in middle school gym class–wears her bisexual validity like a badge. More power to them, of course, but you’ve never stopped to think much about what your crushes and fantasies say about who you’d like to sleep with. At the moment it’s no one since you and Ji Soo made a pact to remain virginal until at least after graduation. Ji Soo will probably make it till marriage if your recent conversations with Jin are any indication to his plans for when the two of you graduate. But once college rolls around you’re not sure what’s going to happen. You know well enough that college is the land of experimentation, but the closest you’ve gotten to wanting to let anyone have their way with you is an uncoordinated game of Seven Minutes In Heaven at one of Jae Bum’s parties. The guy you got paired with was too scared to get locked in the closet with you so Jae Bum took the honor of quite nearly fucking you against the wall for the longest seven minutes of your life. Still you haven’t felt the need to go either way, though sex as a concept does sound rather appealing. 

“Shouldn’t you be in class?” You ask to cover up your slip into the void of existential crisis. 

“Shouldn’t you?” Jennie counters. 

“No, actually. I only have a first and fourth period today.” 

“And here we are wasting it in the bathroom when we could be in my car. The backseat is rather spacious.” She says salaciously. 

“Maybe you should go take a nap, then. You know, since you’re not going to class.” That stuns her long enough for you to escape her arms and make it to the door. She turns to you with a slightly bewildered look. 

“Close your mouth,” you smirk, reveling in the sudden power shift, “You’ll catch flies.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on [Tumblr](thx-cum-again.tumblr.com) for more.


	2. To Do List

The glower is evident in your eyes as you read over the color coded notes scribbled on the board in your teacher’s distinctive, I have a doctorate degree handwriting. It’s barely legible, like he’s written it in some prehistoric lexicon and it’s times like these that your grateful for your brain’s ability to decipher words based on the placement of single character and the length of each squished-together scribble. A few of the words look like part of a cypher you could never hope to decode, curling and crossing over themselves like a broken slinky. You make do, transcribing what you can in a much neater format before taking a picture for extra precaution. The agitated back and forth of your pen in the margin of your paper is decidedly neater than the instruction for your upcoming project. It’s completely ludicrous to assign a project so late in the year when you’re supposed to be coasting through your last handful of classes before finals and graduation. But, of course, your scatterbrained physics teacher forgot to tally up the amount of projects needed per marking period and dumped a last minute one on you to compensate for his slip up. The only upside is that he assigned the easiest, Google search project possible and has a list of pairs lined up so you can all split to already light workload between the two of you. It’s almost expected that’s he’s managed to misplace it ten minutes before class ends. And when he manages to locate it, two minutes before the bell rings, he follows your name with the one you’d least expected and most loath: Jennie Kim. 

“It’s not fair. I could’ve literally been paired with any other person, but it just _had_ to be her.” It’s been a good half hour since you got home and you’ve filled that entire time frame with complaints about probability and injustice. Admittedly, your AP physics teacher has no way of knowing that you have a mental restraining order on Jennie, but it still doesn’t make the fact that he paired you with her any easier to swallow. “Should I ask him to switch my partner?” There’s a spot of static crackling through your phone speaker as it gets reacquainted with relating audio after being silent for the better part of the conversation. The sound of Lisa’s laughter is interspersed between the white noise. 

“You can, but wouldn’t you much rather just do the project yourself and not talk to her at all? You said it yourself, it’s not that hard.” 

“Yeah, but then I’ll seem like a prudish baby for trying to avoid her.” It’s a contradictory statement since you most definitely don’t want to interact with Jennie but the thought of bruising your pride, even this late in your high school career, sounds bad. Strangely, though, you only care because it’s her specifically. Had it been any other person you had a bad experience with in the past you would’ve sucked it up in the name of a good grade, but this is entirely different. You’re not yet sure why that is. 

“I don’t know what you want me to say.” Lisa deadpans, soundings adequately tired of your nonsensical issue that’s only an issue because Jennie is involved. You decide to change the subject. 

“How’re things with Bam Bam?” The screen turns into a blur of colors as she rolls over in bed, crumpling whatever homework she had laid out with the intention of maybe doing if she felt up to it. 

“SNAFU. Nothing’s changed.” You mull over how to answer the unchanged status as you pull the cap of your highlighter off with your teeth. 

“I thought everything would be fine once he got his phone back. Why is he still acting like a dick?” The last word is muttered under your breath as you hear the front door open, announcing your dad’s return from work. Before Lisa can answer you with some colorful words of her own you jab your earphones into the jack, pinching the skin of your finger in your haste to censor her. She’s only halfway through her tirade by the time you get your earbuds in. 

“–thought he’d be back to normal, but no he’s still being an asshole. I don’t know what I did but he’s getting on my fucking nerves. Why the hell would Jackson say he liked me if he doesn’t?” You hum and nod at the appropriate times, letting her blow off steam as you finish your homework. It’s mostly busy work from teachers that need more grades in but have given up trying to teach the seniors that don’t want to be there anymore than they do. Lisa is just about done with her rant by the time you’re putting the top back on your highlighter. 

“I can text Jackson if you want. Or Yu Gyeom.” 

“And say what? ‘Why is Bam Bam suddenly ignoring Lisa?’” 

“I was gonna say it with a bit more finesse, but I can say that if you want.” You tease. She glares at you through the screen. 

“Don’t you dare.” 

“Okay, I won’t. But you do want me to text them?” 

“Just Jackson.” 

“Alright,” you’re already clicking out of FaceTime and opening your last conversation with Jackson. You laugh as you read the last few messages in the thread before phrasing Lisa’s sarcastic remark in a more nonchalant way. “Done. Now we wait.” 

“What’s today?” Lisa asks after a beat of silence. 

“It’s Wednesday.” 

“Do you want to go to the movies after school on Friday?” 

“And see what?” 

“There’s a new romcom coming out that looked pretty good and I don’t want to look like a loner going to see it by myself.” 

“I guess we can. Oh, Jackson answered.” 

“What did he say?” 

“‘Bam Bam has been acting off for weeks, but it’s mostly around Jin Young.’” 

“That prick.” Lisa interjects. 

“Yes, yes, Jin Young’s an asshole. ‘We’re throwing a party at Jae Bum’s house Friday night. Bring Lisa so we can figure this out.’ Looks like we’re not going to the movies after all, unless you’d rather do that.” 

“Not a chance! We’re going so I can punch Jin Young in his perfect little face.” 

“Or you could finally punch Bam Bam in the face... with your lips.” 

“Ugh, don’t be cheesy.” She laughs. 

“I’m just saying, if we get to the bottom of this conspiracy then you’ll finally get a boyfriend.” 

“And you’ll be the only one in our friend circle without one.” She teases. 

“Ji Soo doesn’t even count. Her and Jin are practically married at this point. She’s like a grown woman compared to us children. And I do mean children because no boy in our grade has proven that they can act like adults and we’re graduating in a few weeks. I might as well bide my time until I can mingle with some real men.” 

“I can promise you right now that college boys are most definitely _not_ man. And besides we have some mature guys in our grade.” 

“Yeah, okay, we have a _few_ , but one of them is in love with you and the others aren’t interested in anything permanent. College campuses are bigger, I’ll have more luck with more people.” 

“You’re not wrong,” Lisa concedes, “but somehow I don’t think you’re right either.” 

“I’m always right.” Lisa laughs at your quick retaliation, but the sound is interspersed with the sound of your dad yelling something to you from downstairs. His voice is distant and echoed but you catch the gist of his words and frown. You don’t want to spend your evening at some random stranger’s house, but they’re new to the neighborhood. You’ve been dreading this day since you first saw the moving trucks and now you inform Lisa of your plight with a grim look on your face. 

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic. It’s free food. And who knows, they might have a hot son for you to hook up with.” She raised her eyebrows suggestively. 

“Doubtful, but I’ll keep you updated.” You promise before hanging up and flopping heavily on to your back. Today has not been your day with the whole Jennie as your project partner situation and now you have to deal with this dinner that could very well be disastrous. It probably won’t be but you also thought that about getting Jennie as a partner. You grumble about the injustice of your day as you get ready to leave, taking special care to look attractive in case Lisa’s premonition proves to be right. You’re not looking for a quick hook up but maybe their son that may or may not exist will go to the same college as you. It wouldn’t be so implausible seeing as most kids ended up going to the same university that separates your relatively small town from a bustling city. It’s the first step into a world bigger than your cozy community, like training for the real world and you can’t wait. Not because of the expiration date on your pact with Ji Soo, but because you’re tired of all the petty high school drama that won’t have any impact on the rest of your life. You’ll be glad to be rid of kids like Jin Young and Jennie as soon as possible. Just to prove a point you paint your lips a striking shade of red, one your mother insisted was too mature for you when you first bought it. But you’re a mature girl and you wear it like a badge of honor. Your mother doesn’t mention it either when you climb into the backseat, looking admittedly more done up than necessary. 

“What’s with all the razzle dazzle?” Your dad asks before you can savor your small victory. He turns down his oldies station and glances at you through the rear view mirror; a sign of an inescapable conversation. “I thought you didn’t like when we took you along to these friendly get-togethers.” 

“I didn’t, as in past tense, but I’m not twelve anymore, Dad. I can handle talking to new people.” 

“Oh, my apologies, Miss Lady, I hadn’t realized you’d gotten so old. It feels like just yesterday I was dropping you off at your first day of kindergarten.” 

“ _Dad_ ,” you groan, “spare me the sob story. I’ll always be your little girl, I’m just slightly bigger than I used to be.” And it’s true. No matter how tall you get, he’s still a mountain compared to most people and your mother’s less than average height didn’t help to add a couple extra inches to your height, so you do it with heels. 

“Make a left turn here and their house is the one with the blue door.” Your mom saves you the rest of your dad’s emotional ramblings by directing him to your destination. The GPS on her phone repeats what she just said in more technical terms before deactivating. 

“Wow, half the town came out for this.” You second your dad’s observation with a hum. This is the richer side of town where the larger houses–the party houses–reside. Your dad had passed Jae Bum’s house a few blocks back after taking a wrong turn and you took a moment to admire how it looks when it’s not ransacked by a bunch of drunk teenagers. It makes you wonder how long it’ll take him to clean up the mess on Saturday. Maybe you’ll come by and help. Maybe. 

“Just park here,” your mom instructs. It’s a few houses down, but with the way the streets are lined there’s no way there’ll be a better parking spot further ahead. Although you wish there had been as you see who’s house you’ve parked in front of. This day just keeps getting worse and worse for you and you’re about ready to just go home and call it a night even though it’s only six. It’s a small miracle that it’s not Jin Young’s house you’re in front of because in your sour mood you might’ve been tempted to throw something at the perfectly maintained house, but, then again, there isn’t really anything stopping you from throwing something at Jennie’s front door. Except maybe your parents. 

“Hey,” she calls your name like you’ve been best friends for years and you want to shut her up before your parents misinterpret her kindness, but it’s too late as your mom rounds the car to stand next to you. 

“Honey, I didn’t know you had girl friends on this side of town.” She says, probably remembering the many times you’d frequented Jae Bum or Jackson’s house to get out of whatever book club or game night your parents were hosting. 

“I didn’t know she had girlfriends.” Jennie quips with an innocent smile. 

“Oh, sure she does. You two must go to the same school. Have you not met Ji Soo?” 

“Or Lalisa, I believe her name is.” Your dad supplies. 

“She just goes by Lisa. And shouldn’t you two be getting to that dinner party now?” You ask hurriedly, gently nudging them in the direction of the house with the blue door. 

“We get it, we’ll give you girls some alone time.” You mother winks and you want to scream. Why was she like this? “It was nice meeting you...” 

“Jennie, Jennie Kim.” She supplies with a billion dollar smile. It’s so different from the sultry smirks you’ve seen her give to so many girls before. Seeing Jennie act so sweetly is almost giving you whiplash. And why is she doing it in front of your parents of all people? You glare at her as you wait for your parents to move out of earshot. Once they’ve entered the house in a chorus of hello’s and how are you’s you stomp up the walkway to where she’s standing on her front porch. 

“What the hell was that?” 

“What was what? I was just being polite.” 

“Yeah, but _why_?” The playful half smile you recognize so well returns to her lips as she quirks a perfectly defined brow at you. 

“Can’t I be nice to my girlfriend’s parents?” 

“You know that’s not what she meant.” Just being in her presence while she gloats over and obvious misinterpretation is grating on your already dwindling nerves. Jennie laughs, tossing her head back and letting the sound echo off the vaulted awning. The feeling of your nails biting into your palms keeps you grounded as age moves to sit on the porch swing, that delighted smile still lighting up her face. 

“Do I?” The swing creaks quietly as she pushes off the porch with one foot. “Like I said ‘sexually ambiguous’.” 

“I’ve never had a girlfriend,” you snap, “I’ve never dated anyone!” Jennie’s foot stills and the swing comes to a slow halt. The tense silence is only broken by the sound of the chains coming to a stop. 

“Really?” 

“Yes.” It’s muttered under your breath and you half hope she’ll think you said ‘no’. What even possessed you to say something like that to a girl fueled by getting things she can’t have. 

“ _Really_?” This time it sounds like the pleased purr of a cat that’s just caught a mouse by its tail. To save yourself from further embarrassment you straighten your back and turn to leave. 

“I don’t have time for this.” The swing creaks as Jennie stands and you can’t escape fast enough. Her hands catch your waist in a tight grip, pulling you back towards her. 

“Well, before you go,” her breath tickles your ear as she whispers into your hair, “ I thought I’d tell you you look fucking gorgeous in this dress.” Her grip tightens to prove her point. “Makes me wonder if those legs go all the way up.” You’re quick to catch her hand as it migrates lower, moving just over the curve of your hip. 

“Don’t you have a girlfriend to fondle?” 

“Doesn’t mean I want her. Maybe I just want you.” 

“Yeah, me and every other girl in our grade. Let me go, you pervert.” 

“Fine. See you Friday.” The feeling of the sun’s rays shining against your back as you step out of the shade of her porch does nothing to chase away the shivers her words caused. You’d expected her to be at Jae Bum’s party, but she has a motive to seek you out. Perhaps Lisa could be convinced to go see that movie after all. 

* * *

Of course, skipping out on the party was completely out of the question and Lisa had made that glaringly obvious with some colorful language and spam of emojis after you texted her during dinner. Though she was also probably pissed off by the conversation that led up to you sheepishly broaching the subject of not attending what could quite possibly be the last party of your senior year. That alone made it hard for you to formulate a good defense for skipping out, but paired with the fact that it could be the exact thing her and Bam Bam needed to make their relationship official, the odds of her agreeing had been slim to none. Adding on the fact that Jennie is still after you like a rutting dog makes for a potentially disastrous night that the two of you have promised to see through to the end, but you aren’t particularly happy about the promise you’ve been bullied into keeping. Actually, you’re tempted to ask if you can third wheel with Ji Soo and Jin on their movie date to ironically see the romcom Lisa had suggested you watch together. It would be comfortable at best and awkward at worst, but it would keep you from quite possibly getting into a first fight with the student body president or getting attacked by a hormonal she-wolf. Either way the today’s odds weren’t in your favor. You felt jealous of the boy in your first period that got to go to the nurse for an obvious stomach bug. He’s been quarantined there all day, getting out of school work and parties alike. You’re not feeling enough fanatic desperation to barge in their and infect yourself with some unnamed virus, but you’re getting close to it. 

You try to will yourself to calm down. This isn’t you. You aren’t a anxious and manic person. It usually takes a bit more than a few non threatening words to work you into a lather and yet here you are unable to control yourself. Why is it so easy for Jennie to get under your skin? It’s not like you’re the first girl she’s ever made a pass at and you most certainly won’t be the last, so why do you feel like you’re different. Perhaps it’s the angsty teen that still resides somewhere within you that believes the world revolves around her and everyone’s decisions are made with you in mind. They aren’t and yet you’re still floating through the day on a high that hasn’t left your system since your last encounter with Jennie. She hadn’t bothered you at all yesterday and you’ve managed to avoid her all day today. It’s a nice reprieve, but your thoughts are still so occupied by her that you still feel her eyes on you even why she isn’t around. And you’re sure she’s not around because Jennie would probably spontaneously combust if she set foot in the library. 

It’s blissfully void of the boisterous underclassmen that usually congregate in here to waste time rather than do their work and you’re more than grateful for the muted atmosphere. If you had to survive in the constant maelstrom of lights and sound outside this dim room full of books and silence you’d probably tear your hair out and scream. With all that’s going on right now; studying for finals, that stupid physics project, figuring out how to play matchmaker for Lisa and Bam Bam, and now trying to dodge Jennie at every turn, you deserve some peace and quiet if only for an hour or two. The only sound that follows you now is the floors creaking under your footsteps as you peruse through the shelves of books. After winding through the maze of shelves you settle on a comforting book you’ve read many times before. You’re teetering too precariously on the edge of sanity to invest yourself in a new world with new characters. It’s nice to know everything that will happen in this contained little universe, to know everything will go as it should and end happily for all the characters that deserve it. 

The long, loud drone of the final bell followed by the static crackling of the old intercom system wheezing to life so Jin Young can read off the afternoon announcements thoroughly startles you. It breaks your immersion and sends the book leaping out of your hands as you jump at the loud noises invaded the quiet space you’ve found in the back of the library. Luckily, no one has wandered in your direction since you first sat down to read so you recollected yourself free of judgement and embarrassment. By the time Jin Young dismisses the seniors you’ve placed your book back on the proper shelf and wished your librarian a good weekend. She wishes you the same, though her words are wasted as Jae Bum’s party and your inevitable clash with Jennie draws nearer. Your reluctance, however, is irrelevant seeing as Lisa is excited enough for the both of you. 

“Took you long enough,” she laughs through her open window. “For a second I thought you chicken out on me.” 

“Don’t be fooled by me getting in this car,” you quip, “I am still very much contemplating it.” 

“Don’t be like that. Tonight will be fun.” 

“Yeah, fun for _you_. I’ll be lucky if I don’t get into a fight with Jin Young.” 

“Or Jennie.” Lisa supplies happily. 

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure if I run into Jennie tonight I’ll just be eaten alive.” 

“And there you go being dramatic again,” 

“More like still.” You’ll be the first to admit you’re probably hyper-fixating on something that will turn out to be nothing. If Jennie was invited to the party then so was her arm candy. And for as promiscuous as she is, Jennie has yet to cheat on Chae Young in front of her own eyes. Though you’re certain she’s aware of her transgressions. It’s impossible to be a girl at your school and not hear about what’s new with Jennie and so and so, even inadvertently. 

“Did you at least bring something cute to wear? I will force you into one of my dresses if you’re going to try to wear jeans to this party.” 

“Definitely not.” You agree. After bringing out the big guns for an inconsequential dinner party, you can only go up from there. If the dial was already on eleven you’ll just have to snap it off for the last party of your high school career. 

“Good. We’re dressing to kill tonight.” 

“Who do you have to kill.” 

“Bam Bam if he doesn’t fess up to Jin Young sticking his perfect little nose in our business.” She says matter-of-factly. Your response is cut off as she makes a hard right to avoid waiting at a red light. 

“Maybe we should just get to your house in one piece before we worry about the party.” 

“Are you calling me a bad driver?” 

“Of course not.” You laugh. 

* * *

“You know what? I revoke my earlier statement, you _are_ a bad driver.” The rings Lisa insisted you wear dig into your fingers as you white knuckle the grab handle. 

“Only in heels!” Lisa cackles. “Plus I’m excited. In a few minutes we’ll be at the party that will change the course of the rest of our lives.” 

“Sure, as long as you don’t kill us first.” Even though you’re dreading actually going to the party, you feel a bit of the tension roll off your shoulders as you pass the sign for Jae Bum’s development. It’s a promise that if you can make it through the next few blocks without having a heart attack or Lisa wrapping you two around a lamppost, you’ll be able to set your feet back on solid ground and move at your own leisurely pace. 

“Loosen up,” Lisa advices, although it only serves to make you more nervous as she takes a hand off the wheel to playfully shove your shoulder. 

“Ten and two!” You scold, waving wildly at the wheel. 

“Calm down, we’re almost there.” 

“Almost means there’s still time for you to kill us!” 

“Look, there’s a spot right there.” Lisa assures you, neatly pulling into the space to calm your frazzled nerves. You’re here. Now comes the hard part. Lisa wastes no time jumping out of the car and tossing you the keys as you tentatively step out, eyes searching through the twilight for any unsavory faces. You catch the keys and tuck them into your clutch, relieved that Lisa and her five inch heels won’t be taking you home when the party’s over. You’re not sure she’ll be going home at all if all goes well with Bam Bam. You think over the contingency plan for if that’s the case as your own, reasonable high heels click against the pavement. If Lisa goes home with Bam Bam, then you’ll go to Ji Soo’s house and say all three of you are having an impromptu sleepover and since Ji Soo is on her date with Jin that means he’s probably sleeping over which means her parents aren’t home to debunk your lie. It’s nice having a friend mature enough to be left alone for a whole night with her college boyfriend. Lisa ought to be grateful if you have to go through the trouble of dropping her and Bam Bam off at his house. 

Speaking of houses, Jae Bum’s is alive with music you can almost hear from the sidewalk and tacky strobe lights he probably bought at a party store. And even though you’ve been in the exact position plenty of times before, you’re hesitant to enter. It’s not until you remember your promise to keep Jin Young out of Lisa’s way that you muster up the courage to walk into the house. Immediately you’re swallowed by a wave of bodies. The party has barely started and already everyone is slick with sweat and loose from alcohol. You wrinkle your nose as someone’s Solo cup ends up in your face during your attempt to fight through the wall of gyrating bodies to a more open area. The sea of people spits you out into the dining room where a group of people are playing poker at the table. From the look of the players it must be strip poker. You loiter in the doorway for a few minutes, peeking at people’s cards until a girl from your math class reaches under the table to put up her hot pink thong. It’s the ravenous look in the other players’ eyes that drives you away. You’re not a voyeur and the air was getting a bit too sexually charged for your liking. 

On your way to a more modest area your shoulder catches on someone’s passing arm and the momentum has you teetering in your heels. They catch you by the waist before you can go careening into the expensive-looking vase precariously displayed on a small table. Mounted above the table is a mirror and you nearly snarl at your reflection when you catch focus on who’s holding you. Jin Young’s dark eyes find yours in the glass, falling into shadows as he smirks in the low light. 

“Just the girl I’ve been looking for,” his grip tightens on your waist to cement this as a conversation–or confrontation–you won’t be avoiding. For Lisa’s sake you swallow the anger this man has instilled in her and by extension yourself. Jin Young needs a preoccupation to keep him out of Lisa and Bam Bam’s way and you’re currently in a perfect position to supply it. 

“And why have you been looking for me, Mr President?” Jin Young’s eyes flit to the crowd of people slowly spilling into the Hall before looking back at you. 

“Not here.” He decides, abandoning your waist to guide you upstairs by your wrist. If this were any other situation you’d have tugged your wrist back and snapped something about not needing him to lead you around like a child, but the urge is quelled by your resolve to make this night about Lisa. Surprisingly, there are people upstairs. The first room Jin Young finds is occupied by a couple halfway to paradise with their clothes still on. You tug the door closed fully as you pass. The next room is a guest room, lavish and untouched. It reminds you of a hotel room as Jin Young shuts the door behind you. 

“Well, you have me here, now what do you want?” 

“I _want_ a lot of things. From you in particular.” His words sound haunting but sincere. 

“I need more than that, Jin Young.” 

“It’s a miracle! She’s said my name. I haven’t heard you say my name in months.” He confides. You hadn’t realized he payed so much attention to things like that. 

“I have my reasons. But if you don’t have yours for pulling me in here I think I’ll be leaving now.” His hand slams into the door before yours reaches the knob. 

“Don’t–just–this is hard for me. This situation has always been the other way around.” This is the first time you’ve ever heard star child Park Jin Young sound meek. It doesn’t bring you as much satisfaction as you thought it would. In fact, a feeling of something soft sparks in your chest. 

“Jin Young,” his breath hitches in your ear as you say his name again, “If I didn’t know any better I’d think you were trying to confess to me.” He moves closer to you until you can feel his body pressed against your back. 

“And what would you say if I told you that’s what I’m doing?” 

“Tell you you’re the first that I’ve believed which makes this even harder.” You turn in his arms, wanting to at least look him in the eyes as you reject him. 

“No.” The look in his eyes is near frantic as they catch on the determined set of your jaw. “No, don’t. Please, I–I’ve never felt like this with anyone else just–just give me a chance.” 

“I don’t think I can do that, Jin Young.” 

“It’s because of her, isn’t it?” His voice is a lethal mix of anger and defeat. “You don’t want me because of Jennie.” Your breath stutters with a sharp whistle in your throat. Is that what he thinks of you? 

“It has nothing to do with her!” In your anger you shove him away, only moving his tall frame a few feet back. “It has everything to do with you!” All the anger you’ve been holding back finally bursts through the dam of silence. “I’ve seen how you treat your friends. Your controlling and manipulative. Always poking your nose in things that don’t concern you. Do you know how miserable you made Lisa that day you stole Bam Bam’s phone? She was devastated! And you did it–what?–to keep Bam Bam’s attention on you? If you think I’d date a man like you then you’re wrong!” 

“No, it’s not like that! I was trying to look out for him!” His hands are frantically grabbing for yours as you try to walk away. “Bam’s been hurt before in the past. I was trying to protect him!” The thought that what he did was born from a platonic place of protection lessens the severity of it, but it doesn’t take back the pain he inadvertently caused your friend. 

“That’s not your call to make, Jin Young! People have to make mistakes to learn for themselves.” 

“Then let’s make a choice right now. We have to learn from our mistakes, right? That’s what you said. Let us learn because I really want to be with you! I can learn to let people choose for themselves. I can learn to not always be in charge. Just, please, give me one chance. If I’m the first that you believe then you’ve never gotten to make dumb mistakes before. If this goes south and you want to break up, then so be it. But what if the mistake is us never having tried in the first place? I don’t want to live the rest of my life knowing I let you walk away.” The sheer amount of emotions coloring his tone paints a picture in your mind of all the little things between the two of you, things you’d thought were inconsequential but must’ve meant the world to him. There was a time before Lisa that you looked fondly upon Jin Young, but always from a distance. With a buffer of others between you. If it’s enough for him then maybe it’s enough for you. Maybe. 

“I can’t say ‘yes’ right now,” Jin Young looks crestfallen, “But I’m not saying no either. There’s something I have to do first.” 

“Now it’s about her, isn’t it. You know she’s only going to break your heart.” 

“Maybe, but who’s to say you won’t do the same?” He’s quiet then, resigned to the truth of your words. 

“I meant what I said, Jin Young. Just let me think through this first, please.” A rueful smile gives his grim expression a soft glow as he offers you a chivalrous arm to lead you back to the party. 

“Of course.” 

Lisa and Bam Bam are nowhere to be found as you descend the steps with a hand still on Jin Young’s arm. You decide that means good things as the two of you rejoin the crowd. The hesitance in clear in his expression as he looks in the opposite direction you want to go. It’s like he’s a computer fighting against his coding as he strains to break his controlling behavior. It’s a small step but he returns your arm, moving away to show that he isn’t going to drag you along with him again. A part of you almost wishes he had as heat like the tongues of a flame lick up your back. It’s nothing compared to the hellfire blazing in the eyes of the only other person you’d planned on avoiding tonight. You aren’t sure if why you say it but her name slips from your lips before you can stop it. 

“Jennie,” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Tumblr for more. https://thx-cum-again.tumblr.com.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr for more. https://thx-cum-again.tumblr.com.


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